I will most probably dedicate a few posts at least to finding this out about my sibling, because it was a difficult thing to comprehend. I love my sibling unconditionally but adjusting to things like this can be difficult. It’s almost like experiencing a death in a way.. but at the same time you have a new person! Who is the same person, but slightly different, and you have to re get to know them. Anyway I’m still adjusting and learning about the whole thing. Things take time, but me and my sibling are close again I speak to him every week. Also for the record I’m so bad at using the correct pronouns I will probably alternate between referring to my sibling as s/he just because it’s sometimes a weird thing which I actually avoid using in real life to avoid confusion.
I can’t put a specific date on it, I think it was when I was in lower sixth form that I saw my brother had changed his name on facebook to ‘Erin’. Erin is a girl’s name and HE is obviously my brother. How does one react to this? I can’t remember my feelings at the time, but I think shock/confusion etc are feelings that come to mind straight away. Although at the same time, I wasn’t really that shocked.
After all I am a very nosey and inquisitive person and always have been since I was a kid… You literally could not hide anything from me because I would find it. I loved looking in cupboards and all the places I wasn’t supposed to as a child. Back to my point about not being that shocked. Everyone in my family had noticed little things about my brother close to the time: pink nail varnish, make up, pink phone case, did I mention pink? If I’m being honest though I thought, like everyone else in my family, that he was gay. When we were younger he was never ever typically ‘boyish’, and we all knew that there was something different about him. This was never an issue or a bad thing, in fact all these different things made s/he who s/he is. I would also like to say at this point in time we are not a homophobic family and we definitely did not find a problem with the idea of him being gay. I have a gay uncle, and know several gay people, and I believe that whatever your sexual orientation is totally cool!
Again back to my brother: lots of pink and lots of girly things, but then girls clothes started turning up in my wardrobe that definitely were not my clothes. They weren’t my sister’s or my dad’s girlfriend’s and my brother didn’t have a girlfriend so you can definitely say that I was confused for a while… until the penny dropped later on.
I suppose my point about finding out is I found out on facebook and although it wasn’t unexpected it was still a huge shock.
Anyway, I’m not really sure what other information I want to divulge in at the moment, but I will write more in due course I expect.
Thank you for reading.